Home | baking | I broke the cookies {& other kitchen utensils.}

I broke the cookies {& other kitchen utensils.}

Dec
9
2010
48 Comments

Can you bake chocolate chip cookies?? I mean, can you actually make homemade chocolate chip cookies that are edible and taste good?

Because I can’t.

I tried. Three times.

I have a cookie exchange with some fellow bloggers tonight {yay!} and was so excited because I planned on making this fantastic recipe that was my mother-in-law’s. Hubs makes them every year for Christmas and they are absolutely the most amazing chocolate chip cookies you have ever tasted in your LIFE. I kid you not.

So,  last night I cranked up some Christmas music on the macbook {to drown out hubs xbox gun-shooting, people-screaming, alarms-blaring video game noise} and got things ready to go in the kitchen. I was pretty excited about this!

I mixed up all the goods and added the morsels last…

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And I tried really hard not to lick the mixer thingy…

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I caved and grabbed a spoonful…

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Sooooo yummy. Can I just bring cookie dough to a cookie exchange??

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Perfect!

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This batch made 4 dozen, so I had both ovens going!

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All was well for about 9 minutes.

Everything smelled amazing. Mmmm cookies.

The timer beeped and I raaaaan to the kitchen!

That’s when the disappointment showed up…

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FLAT.

Yep. Like pancakes. Big fat baking fail.

I was so bummed! Surely I just added too little or too much of something – perhaps I got my measuring cups mixed up or something? Maybe I’ve gotten dumber and forgot how to add & subtract fractions?

This left me with no other choice than to make another batch. So, I washed everything and started over, this time being extra careful to follow the directions and make absolutely sure that I was using the right measurements.

Back in the oven they went. And less than 10 minutes later, more disappointment came out.

OK, let’s try one more time… this time with hubs assistance.

Nope, same story. We’ve decided to blame it on the oven. On the last batch, we even lowered the temperature and decreased the time – the bottoms are burning and the top/middle are staying doughy. All of them were completely stuck to the nonstick cookie sheets. Grand.

Feeling overwhelmed, defeated & domestically disabled, I grabbed a fork and did the only thing I could think of at the time…

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They tasted horrible.

If you’re keeping track, that’s:

  • Housewifery: 632
  • Lindsay: 2

    • Oh, and I also broke stuff…

    Awesome.

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    Filed Under: baking, Best Of, domestically challenged, I'm A Real Housewife Tagged With: , , ,
    About Lindsay

    Lindsay is the chic geek behind Designer Wife, a blog dedicated to her attempts at designing a healthy, balanced & beautiful life. She's an espresso addict {decaf}, frequent flier, proud Starbucks Gold Card member, and social butterfly. When she's not blogging her entire life story, she works as a freelance writer, designer and amateur photographer. She and Designer Husband live in the beautiful Queen City; Charlotte, North Carolina.

    • http://www.sowonderfulsomarvelous.com Michelle

      Two things… 1. You may be beating the batter too long. 2. Try making the dough, then popping it in the fridge (covered) overnight and then baking them.

      Good luck!

    • Nicoledhackley

      This has happened to me before…I found that you cannot melt the butter all the way into liquid form, or else the cookies fall flat like yours did. If you soften it just enough to send it through the mixer, that should work. Good luck!

    • Anonymous

      For whatever reason, this is the one cookie I can’t make happen and you’d think it was simple enough. So I can completely relate to this post.

    • http://cantgoogleeverything.blogspot.com Rachel

      NO, I cannot. I follow the directions exactly and measure presisley but they NEVER turn out tasting just right. I gave up on chocolate chip cookies and just buy the break off kind pre made from the store instead :-)

    • Rachel

      good tips!

    • An Authentic Life

      needs more flour…dough is too wet…

    • http://littletower31.blogspot.com/ Brittney

      Awwww! Lindsay, you can eat/take as many of my cookies as you want tonight! I have no idea what happened there, but I will say that one of my tricks is using parchment paper to bake cookies on. Even on non-stick cookie sheets. It makes a huge difference and nothing sticks. You can bring cookie dough!

    • http://eatsloveandhappiness.blogspot.com Amanda

      Aw, I’ve had this happen a few times. I do think the butter makes all the difference. Cookies have a much better form if you use legit “softened buttered” (I have an awesome cookbook with pictures, maybe Google it?) and not my favorite forced softened buttered by popping in the microwave and having some of it melt. Just my input…have fun tonight!

    • Cynthia (It All Changes)

      Is your baking soda old? It’s the leavening ingredient.

    • http://www.designerwife.com/ Lindsay {Designer Wife}

      Nope, just bought it last week.

    • http://www.designerwife.com/ Lindsay {Designer Wife}

      Yup, I thought this was my problem with the first round because it was a little more than soft… kind of melty. SO, the next two I made sure it was just softened a bit. I have no idea what’s up with my cookies. Thanks for the input! :)

    • http://www.designerwife.com/ Lindsay {Designer Wife}

      LOL, thanks Brittney! I’m working on some others now :) I’m definitely going to try parchment paper next time!

    • http://www.designerwife.com/ Lindsay {Designer Wife}

      Tried it all three times. No bueno.

    • http://www.designerwife.com/ Lindsay {Designer Wife}

      SOOOOO GLAD that I’m not the only one! I swear I follow the directions to a T… and yet, this happens. Haha :)

    • http://www.designerwife.com/ Lindsay {Designer Wife}

      Good to know I’m not alone :)

    • http://www.designerwife.com/ Lindsay {Designer Wife}

      Nope, no melting here – just softened every time. :

    • http://www.designerwife.com/ Lindsay {Designer Wife}

      Could very well be a possibility! I was wondering how long I needed to beat it for… and I could’ve over done it. Thanks!! :)

    • http://www.pure2raw.com Pure2Raw Twins

      I have made so many baking mistakes but I realize that I am learning as I go ;) No matter how many recipes it takes me to get to that perfect one! Good luck!
      xoxo
      Lori

    • http://www.designerwife.com/ Lindsay {Designer Wife}

      Aww, this is what I needed to hear, Lori! :) Eventually, I’ll learn how to make a mean chocolate chip cookie!! ;)

    • Pingback: At least someone can bake cookies…

    • iftheshoefits

      I am right there with you — it’s like I have a serious case of baking Yips when it comes to Choco Chip Cookies. I can make any other cookie without incident, but CChip? No so much.

    • http://howbabbyformed.blogspot.com/ The BabbyMama

      Admission: I can, and they rule. BUT there are lots of things I suck at, so there you go!

    • http://mangoesandchutney.com/ Miranda @ Mangoes and Chutney

      I’ve got to say, chocolate chips are hard to do…don’t know why but I don’t think they are like any other cookie. Making some today actually and I hope I have better luck! BTW- I’m with you on just bringing the cookie dough…Mmmm! Happy SITS day, great blog!

    • http://www.mychaosmybliss.com Cecily R

      Don’t feel bad. I actually BROILED not one, but TWO batches of cookies once. And that was a decent baking day for me. :)

      Stopping by from SITS.

    • Laura Day

      My secret to great chocolate chip cookies is buying Pillsbury cookie roll. Just slice & bake & they taste just like homemade…and no one will ever know. Shhhh!

      Happy SITS Day!

    • http://www.dategirldiaries.com Date Girl

      hehehe. It’s all about practice and trial and error. Good for for keeping it up. And always, always lick the spoon.

    • http://www.designerwife.com/ Lindsay {Designer Wife}

      LOL! I love it!! Thanks for stopping by on my SITS day :)

    • http://www.designerwife.com/ Lindsay {Designer Wife}

      HAHA! I literally just LOL’d at that. Thanks for letting me know I’m not alone. <3

    • http://www.designerwife.com/ Lindsay {Designer Wife}

      Now, I want cookie dough for breakfast.

      Thanks so much for stopping by on my SITS day!! <3

    • Alison

      i love to bake and my bestie hates it…she swears that it is impossible for her to produce an edible baked good from her kitchen…but can she cook…like a whirling dervish. which means we make a great meal between the two of us!

      happy sits day!

      blessings,

      alison
      stuff and nonsense

    • http://theresjustonemommy.com Phaetalle

      I’m with you! I have tried to bake my husband a birthday cake several times now, and they’ve all flopped. I wrote about it last month, the only bright note (I had a post idea…LOL)
      Chocolate chip cookies are hard to do! But the dough… yum!
      Visiting from SITS

    • http://snapshots-morgan.blogspot.com/ Morgan

      Oh boy … that sounds a bit familiar! My hubby inherited his mom’s chocolate chip cookie making genes … and I didn’t. I love to cook, but I have had my fair share of baking fiascos. Note to self… don’t mix up the cinnamon and the chicken jerk … two totally different tastes and only one tastes good with cinnamon rolls. :)

    • http://www.misssrobin.blogspot.com/ Misssrobin

      I can’t cook, but I can bake. A couple of thoughts. Your dough looks too moist. I would add 1/2 to 1 cup of additional flour, no matter what the recipe says.

      If that doesn’t help, because you say they were cooking on the bottom but not the top, are you sure both of the heating elements are working in your oven? I had that problem with brownies once (only it was the top that was cooking and not the bottom). Turns out those big wire things that radiate heat and cook stuff can wear out and need to be replaced. My bottom one was no longer functioning. Just something to check.

      Good luck. I hope you get it figured out.

    • Frelle

      i have an oven that refuses to make made from scratch chocolate chip cookies. they turn out exactly like yours. If I buy pre-made dough, it works just fine. I do not understand.

    • http://www.ifthisismotherhood.com Bella

      I can’t make cookies, or much of anything else either. But I would have been (have been) far too irritated to take picture of my domestic failures LOL

    • Karen V.

      Oh my gosh! So many times, I’ve been through this. My first thought was that your baking soda might be too old! Brand new big eggs and baking soda!! Hope this helps…

    • http://lostinaseaofblogs.wordpress.com/ Broot

      I betcha your oven is too hot. You might have it set right, but inside the oven, it’s hotter than you think it is. My cookies turn out like that all the time, and my mother was able to tell me why each time. The first time, I had forgotten a measure of flour. (You tried that, so it isn’t that.) The second time, my butter was too melted. (Did you use room temperature or colder butter? ) The third time, the oven was too hot.

      When I moved to NZ and into this house, no matter what I did the cookies were wrong. Then I found out that what the dial says and what the actual temperature was inside were two different things. Now I always set my oven 25-75 degrees less than what the recipe says, and my cookies are fine.

      Hope that helps! :)

    • http://www.designerwife.com/ Lindsay {Designer Wife}

      Thanks so much for all of your tips! I actually did a follow up blog posts once I found out what my silly mistake was…

      http://designerwife.com/2010/12/14/saboteur-i-can-so-bake-cookies/

      :)

    • http://www.designerwife.com/ Lindsay {Designer Wife}

      Haha, glad I’m not the only one, Karen! Actually, I did a follow up to this one… I figured out what happened…

      http://designerwife.com/2010/12/14/saboteur-i-can-so-bake-cookies/

    • http://www.designerwife.com/ Lindsay {Designer Wife}

      LOL, I had to learn to stop getting frustrated at my domestic challenges loooong ago. It used to throw me in to a blind rage! ;)

    • http://www.designerwife.com/ Lindsay {Designer Wife}

      I actually found out that my issue was I was simply using the wrong kind of butter. I did a follow up to it here:

      http://designerwife.com/2010/12/14/saboteur-i-can-so-bake-cookies/

      Who’d a thought butter would make such a big deal?

    • http://www.designerwife.com/ Lindsay {Designer Wife}

      Thanks for the tips! I actually figured out exactly what I was doing wrong. Basically, I don’t follow directions…. followed up the post here: http://designerwife.com/2010/12/14/saboteur-i-can-so-bake-cookies/

    • http://www.designerwife.com/ Lindsay {Designer Wife}

      BAHAHA! I love that you’ve mixed up spices, too!! I once accidentally put flour on hub’s french toast… instead of powdered sugar. Def not a great taste. Thanks so much for stopping by, Morgan!!

    • http://www.designerwife.com/ Lindsay {Designer Wife}

      Agreed!! I’m not sure there’s anything better than cookie dough. YUM! :) Thanks for stopping by, Phaetalle!

    • http://www.designerwife.com/ Lindsay {Designer Wife}

      That’s awesome!! I think I need more friends who can cook, lol :) Thanks for stopping by today!!

    • CK

      OH my goodness! I had the EXACT same thing happen to me! We must have been using the SAME faulty recipe!!!! Dang recipe!
      I will say that I added more flour to the same dough and got a better, more fluffy cookie out of the attempt but it still tasted awful- AWFUL.
      I’m so sorry man. At least your pictures of the dough looked fabulous! I can almost taste how good it was!!!
      -CK

    • http://www.decoratorondemand.blogspot.com Marie Cole

      I can relate, I can’t make cookies or bake for that matter, but I can cook and that is more important…You can always buy great cookies. ;)

    • http://www.designerwife.com/ Lindsay {Designer Wife}

      Hahah, YES, you can always buy great cookies! :)

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